I never thought a business location could actually alter me as a person but I was just proven completely wrong. After spending 5 years on Prairie Ave in Pueblo CO I walked away last week a totally different person than I was just 60 short months ago. It would be hard to find many positive improvements in me as a person.
When numerous people asked why we were leaving my obvious answer was of course financial which is the most truthful answer…but as I reflect on doing time there on Prairie it is much deeper than money. No longer do I just “assume” everyone is a good person. No longer do I trust just about anyone I don’t know very well. No longer do I believe you can actually change anything by helping someone. No longer do I just go to my car without my head on a swivel. No longer do I believe landlords/managers are out for anything other than the almighty dollar. No longer do I believe that most homeless people are capable of receiving help and just down and out….I could go on and on and on. My point??
Well my point is that once you stay in a location such as Prairie you become “accustomed” to everything happening around you and no longer see how things actually “should” operate. You really give up on change or improvement of surroundings and are forced to merely focus on just you because you have no additional evergy or time to worry about anything besides yourself. Before I moved to Prairie I don’t believe I ever gave really gave up on anything in my entire life….(ask a few dice dealers from my long ago past)….yet a couple years back I gave up on nearly everything here. I realized you can’t actually fix or change anything in this type of environment and this is just “how it is”.
Without the resources from the City, Local Management, or the Owner you are really just out on an island without a boat hoping you stay away from a hurricane. It truly changes a person to the core. I literally hated who I was becoming and honestly a lot of what I have already become. And that isn’t just me….in the few days since we “got out”…..I visibly noticed how much happier my wife and family is already. Talk about living under a cloud. It honestly feels like a 20,000 lead weight just fell off my back as well. I never in my wildest dreams imagined moving would have this impact this fast.
So why do I blog on this?…..Because I now realize how easy all of us can be manipulated into believing this or that is “normal” or “acceptable” or “unavoidable”. Look around at your own surroudings and life and ask yourself where you stand. I can now strangely and remotely relate to how people in terrible circumstances from inner city to domestic violence can’t get away from a situation. It just isn’t that easy and the mind has a weird sort of way of making you believe it is “normal”.
I have a newsflash…Prairie and the majority of the City of Pueblo is anything but “normal” right now. Don’t live in a cloud or in disbelief…what is happening there right now is hard to believe once you step back and get away. I get it…it is easier to just accept it and for most there is no way out. This is a monumental task ahead….one that I will personally not be a part of. I am now a new person….not sure a better person…but certainly a different one. There is no possible way I could say “Thank You Prairie”…..but boy does it feel incredible to say “Goodbye Prairie”.
